One Year Ago. Hindsight.

One year ago, we were preparing for what would be the biggest procedure of Sadie's life. On February 23rd, 2012, she had part of the right side of her brain removed. Similar to a hemispherectomy, the surgery removed her right frontal and parietal lobes of her brain. The hope was that by removing these areas of seizure focus, she would experience fewer seizures and have a better quality of life. The full surgery story can be found here.

It feels a little surreal to be approaching the one-year anniversary of her surgery. In some respects, it feels like it happened so long ago. It's been a rough year for Miss Sadie - a long recovery in Cleveland followed by two subsequent brain surgeries - a cyst fenestration in August to alleviate hydrocephalus, and a shunt placement in December when the hydrocephalus returned.

We knew going into the surgery last year that there could be a range of outcomes - anywhere from significant reduction in her seizures to no reduction. While we did see some initial reduction in the months following the surgery, the seizures seem to have found a new focus area on the other side of her brain.

Is this disheartening, yes. Does it make us question our decision? Of course. But we know that these are the unfortunate decisions that we as parents of a medically fragile child have to make in order to improve her quality of life. They are decisions that we wish we never had to make. We simply have to move forward and continue to do everything we can to make sure she has the best life possible.

On that note, a bit of good news is that her pee strike seems to be coming to an end - yay! After having to cath every four hours for a few weeks, she finally decided to start peeing again on her own. I was never so happy to see a wet diaper. Champagne was popped and celebration ensued. She is now peeing on her own about 90% of the time. There have been a few times every other day or so, when we have to go in to get the pee, but it seems that her bladder has regained it's function.

Ultimately, who knows why she started retaining her urine. Although the pee strike seemed to coincide with her treatment on the seizure medication, Banzel. While urinary retention is not a listed side-effect, Banzel proved to be an awful medicine for Sadie. It intensified her acid reflux - causing her to vomit a few times and actually seemed to make her seizures worse. Once we started weaning her off the medicine, she had fewer seizures. Case made that every girl with Aicardi Syndrome is so different, as Banzel has been a great medicine for many of Sadie's Aicardi sisters.



Activating her light box during therapy

While the pee issues seem to be getting better, the constipation issues continue. We are following the treatment plan of Sadie's GI Motility Specialist who has ordered an anorecal manometry study. She will undergo this test next week to determine whether her muscles "down there" are operating properly to pass stool. Fun stuff.

Another bit of good news, is that Sadie completed her steroid treatment a few weeks ago - whew! We were hoping that getting her off steroids would help with her sleep issues. Unfortunately that does not seem to be the case. As a matter of fact, her sleep patterns have been getting progressively worse lately. She has been a bit hyperactive lately and is unable to nap during the day. At night, she is able to get to sleep, but staying asleep has been an issue. On a typical night, she is up between 3-6 times. The entire house is sleep-deprived.



How the Vagal Nerve Stimulator (VNS) works

We had been holding off on investigating the sleep issue in great depth, thinking that the sleep problems were related to her seizure activity - hoping that better seizure control would equal better sleep. After almost three years, and only a handful of nights where she's slept the entire night - we're ready to pursue an in-depth sleep analysis. More to come on that.

We have also scheduled an appointment to discuss a Vagal Nerve Stimulator (VNS) for Sadie. A VNS is like a pacemaker for the brain - helping keep the brain waves from getting too crazy. VNS has been a highly effective tool for girls with Aicardi Syndrome, and we can only hope that it is just as helpful for Sadie.

So, lots going on in Sadie-Land. She is back in the swing of things with all of her therapies. And overall is more alert and attentive - giving out lots of smiles, which makes this crazy journey a lot more enjoyable!

The Little Things. A Dash of Realism.

Much has happened in Sadie Land since our last blog post...swallow and sleep studies, a glorious period of seizure freedom, and a lot of new activity.

Sadie had her sleep study last week. The premise of a sleep study is to evaluate sleep patterns and determine if any sleep disorders (such as apnea) exist. As you can see by the photo above, multiple wires and sensors are placed on the body to evaluate breathing, leg movement, jaw movement, EEG patterns, etc. It's no wonder that Sadie slept horribly during this study. She was also recovering from a bad cold, so she was already a little congested. She slept about 4 hours that night.

When the nurse called to give the report, she informed me that no apnea was detected, but Sadie needed a little bit of oxygen (big surprise) and never got into REM sleep.

I asked, "Does apnea sometimes show up only in REM sleep?"
Nurse: Sometimes
Me: So do we have to repeat the sleep study once she's better and off oxygen?
Nurse: That probably isn't a bad idea.
Sigh...

I also asked for a copy of the report. It amazes me how much medical jargon is included in these reports. You'd think it was a contest between doctors. Example, the title of the sleep study report - "Nocturnal Polysomnograph Report." Interpreter, please.

Sadie's seizure activity has been all over the place in the past few weeks. She'll have a few good days, then a few really bad ones. Strangely enough, two weeks ago, the seizures stopped entirely. No medications were changed, nothing...we had 6 beautiful days of seizure freedom. Then the seizures came back 7 days later. We had to administer diastat (emergency med) after she had a long seizure that didn't go away after 40 minutes. It was a hugely disheartening.

Because the seizures now are looking a little different than even a few weeks ago, the doctor ordered another video EEG to determine if she is having different seizure types. This information helps the docs determine which medications will work best.

In positive news, Sadie is slowly coming off oxygen. She can go most days without. We do still have to put her nasal cannula in for naps and at night. Sadie has also delighted us the past few weeks by doing some pretty amazing things.

Reaching for and grabbing a toy - The past few weeks, Sadie has gotten pretty good at reaching and grabbing. I know she is interested in a toy when she lifts her right arm immediately when I bring the toy in front of her. She has started to grasp a few toys as well, even pinching some between her thumb and finger. This is a huge accomplishment. Previously, she wouldn't grasp at all and toys would simply fall out of her hand. She's still working on her grasp with the left hand, but I think she'll get there.

Because of this recent interest in toys, we've enrolled Sadie in Lekotek. Lekotek is an organization that helps families with special needs children learn how to play with toys. They have a variety of different toys that are more accessible to kids with special needs. Sadie has a hard time playing with toys due to her low muscle tone and lack of coordination. She can't press buttons on toys like most kids - many of the Lekotek toys are attached to switches which make them easier for Sadie to use.

Rolling over (almost) - Sadie can now get herself up on her left side. It's actually her preferred sleeping position. She'll wind up and flip her right arm and leg over her body - she has yet to fully roll onto her belly, but she has gotten her entire body over except for her head.

Eating - Sadie actually cooperated and we got through swallow study last week. The good news is, she was awake and swallowed her food. The bad news is she is aspirating some of it. The x-ray showed that some of her formula was getting into her lungs. The solution for the time being is to thicken her liquids. We are using a thickener called Simply Thick, which makes the formula the consistency of a thick nectar. The thicker liquid is more difficult to aspirate. We have an appointment to visit a feeding clinic at Easter Seals this week, and we'll work closely with her feeding therapist to tweak her feeds in the coming weeks.

We started to feed her orally the evening after the swallow study. She was a champ with the solid foods and took them great. Tears of joy filled my eyes as she began to suck on her bottle again. For parents of "normal" children, these proud tears are reserved for graduations, little league games, piano recitals, first proms. As parents of a special needs child, it's these small things that keep us going and give us hope.

There many people who say "you'll never know what she'll be able to do." And, while we appreciate the optimism, we have to temper it with a dash of realism, otherwise, we'd be constantly disappointed.

For Sadie, it's the little things that make us so happy - (almost) rolling over, giggling, sucking her bottle, reaching for a toy, grasping an object. We hope for more of these small achievements in the coming weeks.